May 28, 2026 - Oncology Visit - Chemo Reboot
Admitting Defeat (At Least for This Round)
There’s no gentle way to put this. Tami hasn’t been able to keep anything down for many days, leaving her severely dehydrated, lethargic, and so weakened by weeks of inactivity that her muscles have essentially atrophied. She looks gaunt and fragile, and standing—let alone walking—takes everything she has.Today we went to see the oncologist. It took every ounce of strength Tami could muster (plus a little help from her caregiver) just to get out of bed, make it across the hall to the bathroom, and wipe herself down with the sterile sterile cleaning cloths she is using when she is not up to taking a shower.
Vitals and Weigh‑In
As with every Kaiser visit, the appointment began with vitals: blood pressure, temperature, and weight. Tami’s pulse was 125—alarmingly high, even for her. Her diastolic pressure was very low at 44. And then came the weight: 101 pounds. We all knew she’d lost weight, but none of us expected it to be this drastic.
Sending her back in for another round of chemo tomorrow felt, to me, like sending a fighter who’s just been knocked out back into the ring. I knew I couldn’t let that happen. She’s simply too depleted.
Prep for the Doctor Visit
In order to ensure that I covered all of the points that I wanted to discuss, I made the list below (copied directly from my "Google Keep" notebook):
- Hiccups off and on for several days
- Extreme fatigue
- Sleeping
- Unable to keep anything down for several days
- Frequent vomiting with virtually no warning
- No sense of typical nausea, just sudden vomiting.
- Muscle weakness
- Difficulty standing up
- Difficulty walking the 10 steps from the bed to the bathroom (even with the walker)
- Arms not storng enough to help push her up, or pull her up.
- Extreme episodic heartburn (often, but not continuous)
- Dizziness when standing
- Lack of mental clarity and focus
- Difficulty forming words
- Confusion
- Request that we allow Tami to recover more before the next round of chemo.
Discussion and Revised Plan
At our initial appointment with Dr. T, he explained that the chemotherapy regimen he was recommending was the most potent option Kaiser offers. At the time, Tami weighed 135 pounds and was otherwise in good health, so he felt she was a strong candidate for this aggressive approach—and we agreed.
After the first round of chemo, we talked with Dr. T about the side effects, but because Tami had mostly recovered, we moved forward with the original plan. Fast‑forward to today: as I’ve described elsewhere in this blog, Tami did not tolerate the second round well at all.
During today’s visit, we went through the concerns on my list. After reviewing everything, Dr. T agreed that we should pause chemotherapy for a couple of weeks and reassess once Tami has had time to recover. He also will revamp the chemo regiment to be less damaging to Tami, but hopefully still somewhat effective. He did, however, feel she was dehydrated and recommended that we keep the infusion appointments so she can receive additional fluids.
All in all, it was a productive visit.
